The Garmonbozia Within

The Lyrics

They Call Me Obsessed

1996, Daniel C. Eaglin) 1. I'm bending over backwards To meet all your needs. I pretend that I don't see Your evil actions and deeds. You treat me with disdain When your friends are around. But when you need my help It's like I'm wearing a crown. I'm aware of how you feel About my life and my art. But that night you took my wallet You also stole my heart. Refrain: I'll share your air And fix your fair hair They call me obsessed. I dare to bare My soul when you're there. They call me obsessed. If obsessed means I know Where to be when you need me And I'm willing to let all Your enemies bleed me Then I'm that rare guy. Your own private care guy. They call me obsessed. 2. I'm washing up my hands In case that I meet you. I'm brushing and I'm flossing. Now I'm ready to greet you. As much as I try I'm not worthy of you. You've even said it yourself Till your pretty face turned blue. Sometimes I grate your nerves But it's true love that I give. Our relationship is special. Without you I can't live.

Kick The Man Out The Door

1996, Daniel C. Eaglin) 1. Here we are On time for the job. The boss ain't here. Not that old, heartless slob. To play the game right Looking busy is smart. Not quite a science; It's more of an art. When volume's rewarded, It's simple to learn. Do just what they want, Get more than you earn. Play your cards the right way, Then you'll get your turn. Don't forget in the end, All bosses must burn. Refrain: Am I really getting My money's worth? They've been taxing my butt Since the day of my birth. And they've given me back Potholes, fluoride, and crime. They even came up With Daylight Savings Time. So come with me people. We won't take it no more. We can take back the power. Kick the man out the door. 2. Don't mind me Mr. President. You work for me And the money's been spent. It wasn't a gift So I'm on my way. Make up a bed. I'm planning to stay. If you've got a problem With those fools on the hill Or you need some advice On a Mideastern kill Or some girl from your past Is call you still Don't look at me. You're the President, Bill. 3. Those who rule Take all they can get. They're dry and warm. Common man gets all wet. You can hope to find luck While the man's riches grow. It's small consolation But you reap what you sow. Politicians and bosses Sell their soul and their heart. Their horse may look nice. It's in front of their cart. Just remember one thing As you knock the man down. You'll become all you hate When you put on his crown.

Listen To The Silence

1996, Daniel C. Eaglin) 1. Listen to the silence. The silence of the souls. The souls of the dead cattle Whose brains are full of holes. 2. Their lives were filled with mooing And making methane gas. But now they're decomposing Out in the dying grass. 3. There's no more beef for supper Or backyard summer feasts. The pig is our new favorite Of all the livestock beasts. 4. We fed them sheep's intestines Which made them go insane Not that you'd really notice With their naturally small brain. 5. A few became professors And teachers in our schools. These were killed by boredom And from babysitting fools. 6. Some even won elections. They're holding office still. They killed the other cattle Through passage of a bill. 7. The cows in charge say all is safe. I'll stick to pork and beer. The cattle made me crazy. Now I see them in the mirror.

Physical Strife

1996, Daniel C. Eaglin) Refrain: You. You're like a knife that slowly twists. You. You might even have some cysts. When I wake up, you'd better be gone. I gave you a chance, now I'm moving on. Things are so bad, they can't get too much worse. By the day after next I'll be free of your curse. It's really a matter of quality of life. I won't let you cause me more physical strife. 1. I needed you there To make me feel whole; As vital to me Ass my heart and my soul. We were constant companions When mealtime arrived. I gave and you took. You were never deprived. You changed and became A real pain in the gut. I won't take it no more. Prepare to be cut. I've got an assassin, A pro with a knife. It's extreme, but you caused Too much physical strife. Bridge: Ascending or descending Or even transverse. They can all go bad. More Demerol, nurse! Physical strife In your neighborhood Makes even the squares Think that drugs can be good.

Becky Wrecked Me

1996, Daniel C. Eaglin) Refrain: Becky wrecked me. That shows that she cares. She's a hot one. She's used to the stares. Kind of like M.C. But with even less flaws. She's got looks and brains and class. My new number one cause. She can curl your toes But she's thinking of me. For now we're a secret. That's the way it must be. 1. Becky, you wrecked me. I'm coming back for more. Truly, you move me. I'm knockin' on your door. There's no more need for you To play hard to get. I've anted up my heart And I'm not losing this bet. I'm waiting in the rain And my feet are all wet. But that's O.K. We make a great team. Just admit that it's true. There's one person for me. And that person is you. 2. Now that we know that There are feelings we share. Please dear, I do fear I'm in need of some air. I can't believe I'm hearing The things I just said. The only explanation is I'm out of my head. There's no way I would ever Bite your hand as I'm fed. Am I O.K.? You still make me crazy. You know that you do. Ignore my mad ravings. I'm that cuckoo that flew. 3. Becky checked me Into a good home. Doctors shocked her By letting me roam. I found my way back To her door, barred with locks. To think I helped her Study up on futures and stocks. This can't be right. My Becky Was a kind, gentle fox. But that's O.K. We make a great team. Everyone knows it's true. Becky, Becky, Becky. You love me, I love you.

The Small Town Secrets Suite, Part II: Ghostwood

1996, Daniel C. Eaglin) Refrain: We'll put a deal together. We'll call it Ghostwood Estate. The Norwegians may have passed But the Icelanders took the bait. (alt. lyrics: 3rd time The Icelanders got the shaft But this Asian deal really sounds great. 4th time The Asian deal was false. Now it's Catherine controlling my fate. 5th time Catherine seems to be in charge. But revenge will come sooner than late.) We've got some small town secrets. The outsiders need not know. I control this little town But there's lots of room to grow. I can pander to the guests Like any good host should While inside I plot & scheme About this land I call Ghostwood. 1. This town has one man Who's an integral piece. If you want something done It's his palm you must grease. That man would be I. My name would be Ben. My daughter looks almost Like Sherilyn Fenn! My wife is a cipher And my son's less than that. I do as I please Like an old alley cat. I've got all that I need But it's never enough So I'll bilk some investors. It shouldn't be tough. I've got my own laws. I've got my own code. I'm wheeling and dealing In full charmer mode. These Norwegians are loving This land deal I've got. Sure, I don't own the land But that bothers me not. They were ready to buy. Everything was in place When my daughter came in With a look on her face. She told them a story Of Death and Despair. Briefly awed by her presence, Then they flew out of there. Yeah they were awed by her presence And the Death and Despair. The next thing I knew They were way out of there. 2. The Icelanders are better They worship the trees, And the natural sites And our clean small town breeze. They're ready to sign But they want more fun first So we'll take them to Jack's Where their poor hearts might burst. Now they're feeling so good That they're ready to sign Even though they don't know That the land's not yet mine. It belongs to the saw mill But it won't be for long. When it burns to the ground It's mine for a song. It all falls in place But the next thing you know I've got a much better offer And I just can't say no. Screw the Icelanders. I've received all their cash. This mysterious Asian Has a much bigger stash. But just as I'm reaching New heights unforeseen I'm framed for the murder Of this small town's Prom Queen. From the king of the hill To the lowest of low. Kicked like a dog And with nowhere to go. Oh I was kicked like a dog. I had nowhere to go. I was once on the top Now I'm lower than low. 3. Imagine my shock To discover my foe. It's Catherine, that old wench Of whose pleasures I know. She's behind the whole thing, A brilliant con game. I'll bury her some day As Ben is my name. For now, she has won. It's her mercy I need To clear me of murder. She'll make sure that I bleed. Of course, she took Ghostwood And some assets most dear. What I have left of value Is all too unclear. My life was a mess So I went back in time To lead the Confederates To pay for my crime. Somehow we triumphed. We defeated the North. And when I came to Streams of goodness poured forth! I was filled with the need To do the right things Like snacking on carrots And giving up flings. It came in a flash How to do the most good. I'd lead a campaign: Just say no to Ghostwood. Oh yeah I knew then and there The best way to do good. I'll do all I can To put a stop to Ghostwood. Bridge: This Ghostwood Project Makes a mess of the land. The badgers and squirrels And that sycamore strand. Let's all stop Ghostwood. It's the right thing to do. Just sign a petition. Enjoy a free brew. We don't need more golf courses Or shopping mall stores. You can shop down at Ben's. We've got seven floors! Let's not forget the Pine Weasel. They've got nowhere to hide. They all live out in Ghostwood And they're incredible fried.

Welcome To Hell

1996, Daniel C. Eaglin) 1. I got up early that morning In the usual way. The alarm clock knows It's time to start a new day. There's no need to think about it. Gotta work to get by. Can't afford my own Alice. And my threads aren't too fly. So I'm dreaming of a future That's not so bleak as the now When I'll do the things I want. I won't pull the man's plow. That'll have to wait. I've got obligations to meet. I've got to get to work on time Or I'll be out on the street. 2. Well, I made it to the job. I'm alert at my post When I feel a sudden shiver Like I just touched a ghost. Oh, hi boss, things are going great. I'm keeping my seat warm, Doing everything I'm told. Would you please sign this form? But the boss man didn't hit me With his usual banal talk. He just stood there kinda strange. His face was white as chalk. All around the place It seemed like just another day. I thought I'd just ignore it. But then I heard the boss say: Refrain: Welcome to Hell. You must have done something wrong. Welcome to Hell. You've really been here all along. You waste all your time hoping That your life is gonna change When in fact it doesn't matter. It's already been arranged. Welcome to Hell. Make yourself right at home. Welcome to Hell. Have another soup bone. All your friend are here. In many ways your job's still the same. I'll assign you hopeless tasks And you'll still be the one to blame. Don't have any thoughts of your own Or I turn up the flame. You're here for good And we're all glad you came. 3. I should have recognized it. Always dreaded my work, That guy whose laugh is way too loud, That mad chick with the smirk. My whole life was spent preparing, Completely unaware. Hell is not just a concept. And I'm already there. You may think your boss is friendly, Just an occasional pain. Don't you turn away from me. I'm the only one sane! It's for your own good. I want to warn you while I can. Don't spend your first life in Hell. Don't hear the words of the man: